Father Figures - Siya Ayanda Mbuyazi

Father Figures

Nature tells us that from around the age of four, children can tell conclusively the difference between the sexes and will then gradually gravitate towards, associate and copy those of their gender. It is this natural evolvement that leads so many an innocent young boys to that pursuit of the noblest of male-to-male bonds: the father figure.

Naturally and maybe somewhat ideally, this would be the biological father, but then again this is neither an ideal world nor a perfect life so very many have had to make do. Do not get me wrong, I am by no means saying that the absence of this illusive father figure person will, by default, have adverse effects on the grooming and rearing of a young man's life. But indulge me if you will, we man truly are our father's sons.

Spring 1956, my father made his debut on earth in the rural pastures of Dondotha, a vast mountainous land 250kms north of Durban. Unknown to him at the time his very outlook on life would be strongly influenced by another man, a man born just World War 1 came to surprise end, a man raised in what my generation can only call the most primitive of existence. These are the man that would- one directly, the other somewhat indirectly- have a significant influence on my life. Now my inquisitive mind kicks in, can the values of the mid-1920s that shaped my grandfather's life path, sill be found in my subconscious DNA? Exactly how much of what this man taught him, did my father pass down to me? At what cost?